College = Stress

            My entire college experience has been defined by the stress that my classes and organizations have put on me.  The singular weeks are broken down into homework weeks, midterms weeks, and finals week with meetings and commitments throughout.  My weeks are defined by the way I handle my time and the stress.  Time is a premium during most weeks, and the lack of time from stringing myself too thin is the cause of the majority of my stress throughout the school year. 

However, the biggest stress factor that I run into is the anticipation that is built up leading to midterms and finals.  Leading up to major tests, I will go into a phase where I barely eat, sleep, or talk and am solely focusing on studying by myself.  I realize that this is an unhealthy lifestyle to live, but my nerves and conscious will not allow me to relax unless I know the material by heart.  My perfectionist in me will not allow me to accept anything other than my very best in my studies. 

I let stress build up on my shoulders until after the tests are over, but occasionally I have to sneak a break from studies and responsibilities every now and again.  To give myself a break and relieve some of the stress, I usually run or exercise and forgot about all of my worries.  Somehow, whenever I run, lift, or play games, I am recharged to attack the next day or problem that comes my way.  I know certain neurotransmitters, such as dopamine, are released and bind to receptors in the brain that give the feeling me a good feeling about myself during exercise.  (Sorry, I somehow had to prove to others that I could prove that I have learned something so far this semester.)  Sometimes, I treat myself to a desert or big meal if I pushed myself harder than normal for a project. 

The best thing that I can do for the future to manage my stress more effectively is to not overwork/over-schedule myself.  Since that is not likely, relaxing more with more breaks would probably be a better way of managing my stress.  People try to keep advising me to relax a little more and not to worry so much; I think if I take a couple short breaks as a compromise to their thinking compared to mine, I feel that that would be a better stress manager over for me. 

Another resource that I could think about is the many counseling or tutoring sessions that OSU offers.  A specific example is the Managing Distress: Self-Management Skills Workshop offered by the ODI throughout the year that aims to help students learn how to manage negative thoughts, tolerate difficult situations, and develop coping skills for different emotions.  By attending those kinds of sessions, they would help me to relieve pressure off of me, and they would help to organize my stress in a way that makes my life semi-enjoyable.  The knowledge that I gained about myself and about relieving stress would probably be a benefit to me in the future.  I could potentially use the new stress relieving techniques to better myself as a student and as a person.    

Realistically, I will fight through the days that are the most stressful and try to make it to the next one; I am aware that that might not be the smartest option, but it is how I operate.  One of these days I will listen to the advice of others and try to find different avenues to relieve stress, but until that day comes, I will continue my life-numbing ways.  Stress is a part of my life that helps determine who I am and what I will become.  I welcome the challenge of my stressful life, and I would not want it any other way.